You spend the most time with her, yet you are most cruel to her. You look at her in the mirror, first thing every morning, devouring her self-esteem in much the same way as a predator does its prey. You sneer at her melanin skin, and the scars she bears. So you slather on layers of concealer and foundation, to increase her resemblance to one celebrity or another. You haven’t seen her natural hair in years and instead ashamedly cover it up in weaves and wigs. You can’t stand to look at her full naked form, dissatisfied with the bulge, unsettled by the lack of curves, disgusted by the cellulite… here comes the anger again. There’s so much that’s wrong!

You hate her job and wish she had someone else’s talents. You think she is dumb and her existence inconsequential. You go through your life ignoring her, spending your money to change her. You would rather she looked like somebody else. That she was somebody else. C.G Jung’s said that the most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely. How true!

The greatest achievement you can make is to fall in love with yourself. To learn how uniquely beautiful you are. How strong you are. To depend solely on yourself, for your happiness. To appreciate how talented you are. To be wrapped up in the richness of your strengths and quirks. So where do you begin to find that love for yourself?

By talking to yourself. Knowing who you really are. Write a list of things you love about yourself. Don’t bother with what you don’t like. Focus on what you have ignored for far too long. Silence the ugly voices. Buy yourself nice things- when you can. Spend time with yourself, as you would with someone you love. Thank yourself.  Remember, you can’t be lonely if you like the person you are alone with.

By Nancy Linda

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